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Knightly Order of Tubthumping
Thee Hippocratic Order of Flying Doctors
Sneaky Order of Hat Thieves
League of the Lifted Lorax
The Honourable Association of Honest Merchants
The City Guards

Pinata Summon
Ni Summons
Cucumber-Sandwich-Making Groups
Ograhs Book Club
Foraging Swap
Military Island Hoppers

Activity Pages

Band Tryouts
Trading Post
Requests for Information
Requests for Help


The Order of the Wyrm
Hammered Anvil Society
High Tower of Wizardry
The Cult of Nidhoggr
The Vaudeville Guild
Order of the Club
The Jolly Roger Cartel


Poetry Club
Joke Contest

You know you've been playing cities too long when...

  • You know the grid locations of all the pubs (There's about 8 now)
  • You once set your alarm for 3:59am
  • Your watch is set to british local time; you live in Ohio.
  • You know exactly how many hours it takes to get 122AP
  • You get tired while walking and think, "Man, I'm low on AP today.."
  • Your first indication that your sleep schedule is trashed are the hallucinated tracers on a passing leaf.
  • You're about to hit "Save page" in the wiki, and stop to think "how many AP does this cost?"
  • You've ever called somebody who makes you do something an "AP Vampire"
  • This brings tears of joy to your eyes:
You attack the Vindaloo Monster.
You lose a Bottle of Lager.
You cause 5 points of damage, and receive 125 experience.
You slay the Vindaloo Monster.
You gain a Dimmed Light Sabre.
You gain a GPS.
You gain 18 Sheets of Paper.
You gain a Card: The Hermit.
You gain 4 Breakfast Bars.
You gain 8 Earth Talismans.
You gain a Glass of Absinthe.
You gain 34 Empty Coffee Cups.
You gain 2 Triffid Stings.
You gain 16 Clean Bandages.
You gain 4 Pocket Watches.
You gain 5 Broad Swords.
You gain 2 Summon Stones.
You gain 6 Bull Whips.
You gain 6 Mugs of Ale.
You gain an Empty Jar.
You gain 3 Short Swords.
You gain an Air Knife.
You gain a Card: The Empress.
You gain 3 Breakfast Clubs.
You gain 3 Field Glasses.
You gain 15 Magic Beans.
You gain 2 Water Knifes.
You gain 15 Sharp Swords.
You gain 11 Pairs of Magic Boots.
You gain 6 Dragon Blood Doses.
You gain 2 Fire Talismans.
You gain 3 Disguise Kits.
You gain 2 Sacrificial Daggers.
You gain 2 Card: The Moons.
You gain 9 Huge Fire Crackers.
You gain 4 Pairs of Scissors.
You gain 3 Cloaks of Invisibility.
You gain a Card: Death.
You gain 4 Doses of Magic Powder.
You gain a Dragon Stone.
You gain a Kings Crest Talisman.
You gain 4 Clocks of Invisibility.
You gain a Lance.
You gain 10 Cruel Blades.
You gain 8 Earth Wands.
You gain 48 Spikey Ninja Throwing Stars.
You gain 2 Climbing Gear Sets.
You gain 5 Sextants.
You gain 4 Sacrificial Swords.
You gain 3 Exotic Cocktails.
You gain 5 Magic Balls.
You gain 4 Cloves of Garlic.
You gain a D4.
You gain a Dawn Horn.
You gain a Dusk Tusk.
You gain 8 Fire Stones.
You gain 3 Empty Bottles.
You gain 3 Air Wands.
You gain a Card: Temperance.
You gain a Jar of Grape Jam.
You gain a Bag of Coffee Beans.
You gain a Card: The Hanged Man.
You gain a Knife.
You gain 119 Saltpetres.
You gain 2 ShortBows.
You gain 2 Card: The Wheel of Fortunes.
You gain 9 Pieces of Chalk.
You gain 3 Card: The Suns.
You gain 62 Arrows.
You gain 22 Palantir-as-you-gos.
You gain a Card: The Tower.
You gain a Cucumber.
You gain a Bunch of Grapes.
You gain 6 D6s.
You gain 2 Sun Stones.
You gain a D20.
You gain 4 Reznor Blades.
You gain 3 Big Pieces of Chalk.
You gain 7 Fire Wands.
You gain 2 Maps.
You gain 4 D8s.
You gain 2 Earth Stones.
You gain 3 Water Stones.
You gain 9 Night Sticks.
You gain a Dueling Sabre.
You gain 2 Water Talismans.
You gain a Card: The World.
You gain a Magic Emerald.
You gain 2 Pieces of Red Chalk.
You gain 107 Feathers.
You gain a Water Sword.
You gain 3 D10s.
You gain 5 Rusty Swords.
You gain 11 Mugs of Coffee.
You gain 10 Bows.
You gain 11 Units of Charcoal.
You gain 4 Night Clubs.
You gain 13 Wand of Angers.
You gain a Card: The Fool.
You gain 5 Badges.
You gain 6 Wands of Illusion.
You gain 6 Tars.
You gain an Earth Knife.
You gain 15 ERROR(Saltpeter, couldn't run GAME/Item/
You gain 4 Swords of Omen.
You gain 3 Small Maps.
You gain 3 Air Stones.
You gain 6 Magic Opals.
You gain a Water Wand.
You gain 2 Card: The Loverss.
You gain 27 Fire Crackers.
You gain a Fire Knife.
You gain 6 Fountain Pens.
You gain 4885 Gold Pieces.
You gain 5 Contract Palantirs.
You gain an Empty Vial.
You gain 5 Crocodile Scales.
You gain 6 Morning Stars.
You gain 9 Sets of Water Wings.
You gain a SunFlower.
You gain 5 Bits of Molten Glass.
You gain 26 Short Strings.
You gain 4 Walking Sticks.
You gain 3 Magic Rubys.
You gain a Sheaf of Wheat.
You gain 6 Long Bows.
You gain a Limbo Talisman.
You gain 5 Brave Stars.
You gain 16 Stones.
You gain 3 Roc Rocks.
You gain 3 Fire Swords.
You gain a D12.
You gain 9 Mugs of Coffee.
Now using Fists.

  • This happens on IRC:
<das05r-lab> You attack the Treeman.
<das05r-lab> You miss.
<das05r-lab> The Treeman misses you.
<das05r-lab> grr
<darkersatanic> Awwww. That's sweet.
<MikeJ> I guess you're quite good friends with him now :)
<das05r-lab> hah
<MikeJ> "Me and my treeman"
<das05r-lab> stand by your (tree)man
<darkersatanic> 50 ways to chop down your lover...
<das05r-lab> it's raining treemen! allelujah!

  • You know how much a loaf of bread costs at the South market, but not at the local grocery store
  • You check cities more frequently than your email
  • You are playing with more than one user.
  • You're in the smallest room of your RL house, idly staring at the lino, and you realise that the repeating square pattern of different shades is making you think "How many AP to get across the room?".
  • You get banned from Ascot for stealing hats.
  • You think "can of Red Bull... Must be Fire Aligned... Use the Water Sword..."
  • You're on Cities at 00:01 Jan 01 2006 jmb 00:26, 1 Jan 2006 (GMT)
  • You don't wear your wooly gloves when you go outside because you're afraid they'll "wear out"
  • You plan your 3 day weekend around feeding a baby animal from Harvey's Farm.
  • Been there, done that. :) -- Sertularian 03:23, 6 February 2008 (GMT)
  • On the badge you wear to a RL fundraising event, instead of your name, you write "There is no Cabal." -- Sertularian 03:23, 6 February 2008 (GMT)
  • You dream about cities:
<dragon> congratulations, elseware.  Your game officially qualifies as an obsession.
* dragon had a dream about cities last night
<MrFoo> Heh
<MrFoo> Maybe you need to be put onto a long retreat, to cure you...
<MJ[Lab> I hope it didn't cause any internal errors :)
<dragon> I think it involved one of the great lords randomly deciding to give me a wizard hat...then 
         I woke up, and thought "oh crap, that was just a dream," and then checked to make sure
<MJ[Lab> lol

  • You wonder whether a friend's multicoulored scarf is long enough to be truly Proper.

I'd just like to thank Elseware/the Great Lords for providing a useful mtehod for freeing people of their cities addiction, namely Foraging in Jungles. Man, being able to do just 3 clicks to use a day's AP makes it so much easier to give up the game. 2 1/2 days, no Large Hard Seed.. I'm almost cured I think. MrFoo 10:03, 16 March 2006 (GMT)

Unfortunately I'm so far gone that things like that just make me depressed and want to take drugs (magic powder). As do moany people. I'm v grateful to the 'king and Great Lords for this fantastic game. Show a bit of respect! Vashka 10:13, 16 March 2006 (GMT)
Moany people? That's me when I'm out of AP on all five (gah) chars. :P --Snarfer 03:48, 4 July 2006 (BST)
You know if you look harder, there's a large hard seed for 1001gp at the western market. Walking there and back surely won't take 2.5 days? LittleHamster 10:21, 16 March 2006 (GMT)
I was actually being half-serious. Before the foraging I'd had a +50AP +3AP/hour hat and found that I was spending far too muhc time playing... MrFoo 13:11, 16 March 2006 (GMT)

Err...this may be the opposite of what is intended, but are there other good acitivity-limited (e.g. Activity Points) online games out there? I'm just about to kick Ogame after an 8-month oddysey that began with the Mountbatten fire. I also tried Kingdom of Loathing, and looked at one called Londinivm I think. Droll 18:37, 19 July 2006 (BST)

well there is Nation States. if you look at my profile i have a link to my nation. Sheyona 19:23, 14 August 2006 (BST)
Thanks! I actually played that one for a while, but stopped when I started getting the same questions again. I wasn't willing to step into the role-playing wars, etc. Droll 17:55, 28 August 2006 (BST)

I play kingdom of loathing characters name is Grippingworm (for an undisclosed reason.) -King1216

  • Regular restaurants don't do Cities desserts
23:44 < jmb> I was in Pizza Express earlier tonight, and when handed the
            dessert menu found myself looking for a Sloe Djinn Sorbet.
23:44 < jmb> Couldn't understand why this was wrong for a good 5 seconds.
  • Out shopping

In Tesco last night, saw a sign with lemons pictured on it, and thought "I want one of those for my Dundee Cake". Almost went to pick one up.

I keep seeing pomegranates in sainsburys and thinking 'now what did I need that for?'...--smudgepuss 22:30, 27 February 2007 (GMT)

On the Matter of Toad

Don't do toad. Lando forbids.

On multiple characters

From IRC. Snarfer runs 7 characters...

<Snarfer> I'm an altoholic, can't help it ;)
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